Looks like shes getting prepared to blow the whistle!!
Warped sense of humor
- Thread starter Ringostar
- Start date
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My Pops said he won a $20 bet when he was 12 yrs old. He'd just hired out to split cross-ties. The buyer showed up, looked at the cross-tie he was working on and bet him $20 dollars that was the ugliest tie in the woods. He took the bet then pulled out the cross-tie he had previously cut hidden in the bushes.
okie
Gold $$ Contributor
there are some old hand cut ties in my grandpas barn holding the eaves up--they are old!
Deleted outa08
Have you been chasing cars or your tail since?
Deleted outa08
She`s too ugly to even be on the radio.Two bagger!
MikeMcCasland
Team Texas F-T/R
Who told?
mjl650
Gold $$ Contributor
When I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams.
If I did not drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would
be shattered. I think, it is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true, than be selfish and worry about my liver.”
Babe Ruth
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.”
Paul Horning
"24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case.
Coincidence? I think not!”
H. L Mencken
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven.”
George Bernard Shaw
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.”
Benjamin Franklin
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, But the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.”
Dave Barry
“Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B.C.”
W. C. Fields
“Remember ‘I’ before ‘E,’ except in Budweiser.”
Professor Irwin Corey
“To some it is a six-pack. To me, it is a Support Group.
Salvation in a can.”
Leo Durocher
One night atCheers ,a TV Sitcom, Cliff Clavin said to his buddy, Norm Peterson: "Well, ya see, Normmy, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But, naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers!”
If I did not drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would
be shattered. I think, it is better to drink this beer and let their dreams come true, than be selfish and worry about my liver.”
Babe Ruth
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.”
Paul Horning
"24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case.
Coincidence? I think not!”
H. L Mencken
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven.”
George Bernard Shaw
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.”
Benjamin Franklin
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, But the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.”
Dave Barry
“Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B.C.”
W. C. Fields
“Remember ‘I’ before ‘E,’ except in Budweiser.”
Professor Irwin Corey
“To some it is a six-pack. To me, it is a Support Group.
Salvation in a can.”
Leo Durocher
One night atCheers ,a TV Sitcom, Cliff Clavin said to his buddy, Norm Peterson: "Well, ya see, Normmy, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But, naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers!”
SEM
Gold $$ Contributor
Close your eyes and open your mouth and you will get a big SUPRISE !!!!!
SEM
Gold $$ Contributor
Or.... ok were done you can have them back...........
KMart
Gold $$ Contributor
So, those are fake too. Just like everything else that comes out of your mouth.
Deleted outa08
He talks the same schiff out of both ends.
In Charlie Brown's best screaming voice... " Aghhhhhhhh !!!!! Fugugly, Nasty !!!"
SEM
Gold $$ Contributor
eh.. hoser, look what we stomped, good one .... eh
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