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I've been missing for a while, slowly getting back.

i Have been married 6 times.I can assure you your probably better off WITH OUT her than with her,it will just take a little time to get through it.
Stay well ,keep your eyes open there are many fish in the sea.
Shooterjon
John, SIX TIMES. You sir, are a true glutton for punishment. I went through divorce twice and I promised myself that I’d NEVER get married again, period.
 
I haven't read every response to your original post, so I haven't heard every single piece of advice you've been given.

The advise I'm gonna give isn't often the most common or usually the most taken, but here goes ---

Stay off of your ass, and go find someone who needs your help in some way. And I don't mean for a relationship. Stay out of your own head, and your own needs, and think of helping someone that ain't you. I'm not gonna explain the mechanics of how this will help you, just believe me -- it will.

I don't know if you know God, but there is never a bad time to meet him. The Lord and his minions are a good bunch, and we're always anxious to help your happiness and even save your soul.

The advice I'm giving, comes from 66 years of living, forty of which were laced with plenty of hard times. PM me anytime ya feel like, and we can talk "off grid" if you like. jd
 
I haven't read every response to your original post, so I haven't heard every single piece of advice you've been given.

The advise I'm gonna give isn't often the most common or usually the most taken, but here goes ---

Stay off of your ass, and go find someone who needs your help in some way. And I don't mean for a relationship. Stay out of your own head, and your own needs, and think of helping someone that ain't you. I'm not gonna explain the mechanics of how this will help you, just believe me -- it will.

I don't know if you know God, but there is never a bad time to meet him. The Lord and his minions are a good bunch, and we're always anxious to help your happiness and even save your soul.

The advice I'm giving, comes from 66 years of living, forty of which were laced with plenty of hard times. PM me anytime ya feel like, and we can talk "off grid" if you like. jd
+ 1 What he said. U will not receive better advice anywhere.
 
Kinda changes the meaning of life ....

Took me a long time to start living for myself. My joys and my happiness.
I didn't know what i liked by myself. I still don't sometimes. But I'm not as lost as i was.
 
Women are like busses. You miss one another will be along shortly.

In all this world, there is only one person responsible for your happiness. Guess who. Of course it's you. In a year, if your attitude is positive, you will have regained everything you thought you lost and be in a much better place. Don't fret about yesterday. Just remember, tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life. Good luck to you.
 
Long story short I have been through a divorce after 36 years of marriage. Wife decided she didn't want to be married anymore and took her shit and left. Kids are all grown and families of their own (they are just as confused as me). She gave me the house that is paid for because she makes triple the money that I do so even with the house paid for she stuck me in a jam. She filed for "disillusion" so she had to pay her lawyer fees and I did not need one. Slowly getting my life back on track but still wake up every day lost and trying to figure this mess out.
Here's the craziness in todays world... We dated for two years, spent months planning a wedding, full day rehearsal, full day wedding, week long honeymoon, 36 years together and it all ended with a 9 minuet Zoom meeting! That's right! I got divorced via a zoom meeting. Just crazy...
My marriage is just the opposite.
I had just got out of the Army, (drafted), and had no desire to get married.
I met Marilyn in a small pizza parlor one night, we dated for exactly 42 days before we got married.

We celebrated our 51st anniversary this year.

My heart goes out to you. I can’t say I know how you must feel, because I don’t have a clue.

All I can say is I hope this is a beginning of a new and better chapter in your life.
 
Can’t add much. Lost my first wife to Cancer 8 years ago so I can relate to your loss though. Life goes on. #1 is to take good care of yourself! Get to bed and make sure you get plenty of rest and have good sleeping habits. Eat a balanced diet. Get some exercise and maintain reasonable health. Get to know the Lord as someone mentioned above (pun?). If you get depressed, go do something for someone else. It’s amazing how serving others can make you feel better.

This may sound strange right now but you’ll look back and see she did you big favor at some point in the future.
 
My marriage is just the opposite.
I had just got out of the Army, (drafted), and had no desire to get married.
I met Marilyn in a small pizza parlor one night, we dated for exactly 42 days before we got married.

We celebrated our 51st anniversary this year.

My heart goes out to you. I can’t say I know how you must feel, because I don’t have a clue.

All I can say is I hope this is a beginning of a new and better chapter in your life.
I to have no clue but wish you nothing but the best, like Jackie I’ve been blessed! 52 years 11/02/2022
 
Everyone suffers alone during these incidents. Sure, family & friends can be supportive, but the healing comes on your own time. When you do heal from this, I know for a fact there are plenty of younger gals, like 40yrs younger than you that are all about the older men. My 70yr old friend is a testament to this. Now, he might give them money to get new tires, fix their car problems, etc, but he is pulling tail in the 30s bracket.

Don't get too wrapped around the axle trying to figure out the why your wife left. She had been checking out for a long time before you even knew it was over and thus had all the emotional clutter resolved and you had to play catch up. "Those girls only trips" my ass.
 
Been there, done that twice. The feeling like you've been kicked out of your own life is a hard one to deal with. When both of mine happened I was a professional drag racer, and even being in a different city every week and putting in 100+hrs at work, it was hard to put in the back of your mind. It's going to take time to get past it. Took me about 2 years to stop feeling sorry for myself, get angry about it, then deal with that and move on. You're going to get to create your own "new normal". Holidays are especially hard. I would go buy some new xmas decorations, really deck the place out and have everyone over. That way you know she won't be there and you can spend it stress free with your family.

It may not seem like much consolation, but at least she didn't take the house, sue for alimony and child support, just so you get to see the kids only when she felt like it or when it was a convenience. Good Luck Man. It only gets better from here.
 
Been there, done that twice. The feeling like you've been kicked out of your own life is a hard one to deal with. When both of mine happened I was a professional drag racer, and even being in a different city every week and putting in 100+hrs at work, it was hard to put in the back of your mind. It's going to take time to get past it. Took me about 2 years to stop feeling sorry for myself, get angry about it, then deal with that and move on. You're going to get to create your own "new normal". Holidays are especially hard. I would go buy some new xmas decorations, really deck the place out and have everyone over. That way you know she won't be there and you can spend it stress free with your family.

It may not seem like much consolation, but at least she didn't take the house, sue for alimony and child support, just so you get to see the kids only when she felt like it or when it was a convenience. Good Luck Man. It only gets better from here.
Her lawyer (I consulted one but he said "if it all go's the way she's wanting you won't need a lawyer"} told her that because of the amount of money she makes she would have to pay me alimony for 25 or more years to balance the incomes. So he told her to give me the house (paid for) so she would not have to pay. The lawyer I consulted said to take that deal! Because alimony has a "stop point" if I remarry but getting the house is mine forever. I took the house. Mostly what has me in a bind is the health insurance, she carried it with her job for both of us so now I had to find my own.
 
Mostly what has me in a bind is the health insurance, she carried it with her job for both of us so now I had to find my own.
If that’s your biggest concern you are looking good!
A tip: Be sure to eat properly regardless of your worries, when you are by yourself it’s easy to choose poor eating habits.
So get your insurance and eat well. Looking good.
 
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