Nick Caprinolo
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Warped sense of humor
- Thread starter Ringostar
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Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
garandman
Bolt Gun Bodacious
Good one !
Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
nmkid
Gold $$ Contributor
Lady feels her husband isn't paying enough attention to her. The next day she waits for him to get home from work. She meets him at the door wearing nothing but an apron. The old man doesn't twitch an eye. That next day she is bound and determined to get his attention. As he comes in the front door she starts walking down the stairs totally naked. As he looks up at her, she says, "how do you like my $1000 dress"? He gives her a short glimpse, keeps walking and says, "You would think that for $1000 they would have ironed out the wrinkles"!! He is expected to only miss 2 weeks from work!!
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
Nick Caprinolo
Gold $$ Contributor
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