Random questions.

[itchyTF]

Should there be a test to get a marriage license?

What do boogies smell like?

If Jesus was a carpenter, why don't we have something he built?

Are all bulls afraid of clowns?

If we evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why can't I get a computer that is impervious to viruses?

How long does it take doctors and lawyers to stop "practicing"?

If gravity can hold my truck on the road, why doesn't the moon crash into the earth?

If we can put a man on the moon in 1969, why can't my truck get 100 mpg?

Absolutely!

You get used to odors after a while so you're immune to the odor. You'll have to ask someone else to smell it for you.

He sold everything.

Mmmmmmm.................

They were the smart ones.

You can, just leave it off.

Never.

Centrifugal force.

You could if the oil and auto companies would stop buying the patents and sitting on them.

 

[rvn1968]

Why do democrats hate Democracy ???

 

[Keith Glasscock]

Why does an iron have a permanent press setting?

 

[joshb]

I've been to most states in the US but not Texas. Wat am I missing????

Texas is wonderful.

 

[John O.]

What noise does an armadillo make?

I don't wish to potentially get leprosy so I wouldn't know.

 

[John O.]

In the song "yankee doodle" is he calling the horse or feather "macaroni"?

From what I remember I think that it is implied that the feather is.

 

[John O.]

1.) Why do we DRIVE on PARKWAYS and PARK on DRIVEWAYS? 2.) Why do we have "Daylight Savings Time" when we OBVIOUSLY can NOT save so much as a nano-second of time?

Where I come from we lack parkways. We park on driveways because there is not enough space in urban and semi urban areas to have private roads.

I know that Ben Franklin had the idea of daylight savings time. However the only purpose it serves in this day and age is to make people late for work, and allow politicians another hour of golf in the mornings.

 

[John O.]

What is the green stuff in chicken crap?

Sorry I lack the laboratory facilities to answer that question.

 

[John O.]

Why is a package sent VIA truck called a shipment and a package sent VIA ship called cargo?

Because gas is what makes the car-go.

 

[John O.]

What happens if you wear a dinner jacket to lunch?

You are predestined to spill something on it when it is most inconvenient.

 

[John O.]

If a man is in the woods
and no woman can hear him ,
would he still be Wrong ?

That depends on what he is saying or doing.

 

[John O.]

Why are there no B batteries?

Because the liberal purchasers will not be able to tell the difference between type B and a typo.

 

[fredhorace77]

If you could convince Remington to reintroduced one of their discontinued model firearms, what model would you ask for?

Mine would be the Rem.700 LVSF

 

[John O.]

Here is a more philosophical question: "Is there such a thing as an atheist 5 seconds after the point of death"?

No. In fact he or she would not have been an atheist for 4.999999................seconds.

 

[John O.]

I've been to most states in the US but not Texas. Wat am I missing????

1. Historical places that have influence not limited to this state.
2. Big Red soda
3. National diversity(climate) all within one state.
4. One of the most freedom loving/hunting/fishing/praying/.......states.
5. The most retired military friendly state. Heard this straight from several ex-military personnel.
6. We have the most friendly drivers. No joke.
7. We have the most wildlife educated people. We know what the " fox says", and their true nature. It ain't angelic.

 

[John O.]

Why is it called a flyer when I blow a group, cause I usually call it something else when it happens?

Don't know I call it shooter error. Unless I am using inconsistent factory ammo.

 

[John O.]

Do you get wetter running in the rain or walking?
Todd

Neither, you get wetter when you work in the rain. Myth busters did an experiment on this and "proved" that you get wetter running.

 

[/VH]

What is the green stuff in chicken crap?

Sorry I lack the laboratory facilities to answer that question.

Why do you need laboratory facilities to figure out the answer is - chicken crap?

 

[John O.]

Why is there a brail at the drive thru ?


If rowing your canoe down the street, your left front tire falls off, how many flap jacks does it take to shingle a dog house ?


Do you walk to school or carry your lunch ?


What's thicker, a dime ?

I was wondering the same about them at art exhibits.\
My sister says "Purple because aliens don't wear hats".
I drive to school or am driven to school, and I will soon have to bring my own lunch.

 

[John O.]

What's thicker, a dime ?

As opposed to what?