You guys are just EP amateurs.........
I started my emergency procedure (EP) career a couple months into pilot training with smoke in the cockpit in a T-37. A few months later in the T-38 we lost hydraulic fluid and the gear wouldn't come up. Those were just warms up for what was to come.
My second flight in C-130 copilot school we had an engine fire. I shut it down as directed and then the instructor flew an engine out ILS in the weather down to minimums. As a C-130 copilot I shut down engines 12 times, was hit by lightning, and had so much stuff to go wrong I can't remember it all.
As a C-130 aircraft commander I shut down engines 5 times and was hit by lightning again. However, as an AC I was in charge, and I got my azz chewed for the lightning strike.
On one engine shutdown I was #2 in a three-ship formation at night on the run-in to the DZ for an airdrop--on a guys lead checkride.
The C-130 lead pilot checkride (and lead nav checkride) was a BIG deal. We always stacked the rest of the formation with strong aviators to give the lead pilot the best chance of passing. In order to pass you had to have your formation lined up across the DZ properly, hit the POI with the first item dropped, and be within ONE minute of the TOT, which was established well before you flew the one-hour low level route. Time planning was a challenge and the workload was very high on the run-in.
Now you need permission to join or leave the formation and it takes a bit of doing to get that clearance from ATC. Normally, lead coordinates all that. The LAST thing a lead pilot wants to do during his lead checkride at night is to have more stuff to do on the run-in.
After I directed the engine to be shutdown and we ran the checklist, I chuckled and commented "The lead pilot (don't remember his name) is going to love this!"
The radio call was "Lead, two". An annoyed vice came back: "two, go". I replied: "we just shut down #3 engine." There was dead silence. I then said: "why don't I break out to the north and get my own clearance back to base." His response: "Yeah, do that".
Later on the ground he thanked me for not messing up his checkride.....
Losing one of your four engines usually isn't a big deal. The only time I was nervous about it was on short final to Guam when a throttle stuck. A throttle sticking in an E model C-130 was a big deal. There were lots of cables and pulleys that controlled the propellor and a manipulating a stuck throttle could cause a prop to go into reverse in the air--which at low altitude was certain death.
My second tour was as a T-38 Instructor and I got to fly upside down, pull Gs, and go supersonic--which is why I joined the Air Force in the first place. My biggest EP in that plane was a compressor stall. It was a student formation sortie. We had finished the formation part, my student just completed his landing, and it was my turn for a landing.
As I was turning 90 to Initial in the pattern the right engine compressor stalled. This meant it was still running but had quit producing thrust. I pulled the throttle to idle and the stall cleared, but now the engine was unavailable.
Unlike the C-130 with it's four very powerful engines, the T-38 only has two engines and when you lose one it goes from being a hot rod sports car to an underpowered Yugo. So you have to be especially careful to keep your speed up.
The T-38 has a tiny wing and it needs a lot speed to fly. We'd fly around the pattern at 300 indicated just to somewhat fit in with everyone else, but it wasn't really happy below 350 KIAS. It liked 400-500 KIAS best. Configured with gear and flaps, the minimum speed on final was 155 KIAS and it wasn't so responsive at that speed. Having only half of your normal thrust meant if you got behind the power curve (this is the real meaning of that phrase), you might not recover.
Oh yeah. It was at the end of the sortie so I didn't have a lot of fuel left. I told the controller I was going to carry through initial and enter the straight-in ground track from that position--not really a standard thing to do but it made the most sense in this situation. He approved that and made sure the pattern was clear for me.
I landed uneventfully using single engine procedures. The scheduler was happy because the student sortie was completed and the controller was happy because I got my EP resolved quickly and got out of his pattern. The SQ/CC found out about and told me good job. A year later they started making a big deal when someone handled an EP well, but that was the overriding theme of my USAF career........never getting as much credit as others for doing the same thing.
The last airplane I flew, the T-1, was a business jet (Beech 400) that the USAF converted to a trainer. I had the scariest EP of all in that plane--dual runaway trim. It doesn't sound like much but trust me, when you cannot control the airplane it is a big deal indeed. We figured it out and what caused it was a broken spring in the trim switch on the left seat yoke. Whenever the trim was moved it would go full in that direction, and the control forces were extremely heavy.
After my last flight in the USAF Inquir flying for 15 years. In the summer of 2019 I decided to start flying again. A friend from work took me up in his old M20C Mooney.
I was very pleased to find that I still had my SA and airmanship. I distracted him with all my questions and he missed changing fuel tanks. The engine quit in the pattern. It was a quick fix and he was embarrassed, but he wasn't an instructor and I asked him questions like he was. It was my fault. However, something HAD to happen on my return to aviation.
I have since learned that general aviaton piston engines are extremely reliable as long as they are reasonably maintained and you don't run them out of gas or oil.
Last year I took the military competency test the FAA has for former military pilots, and I got my CFII Multi. I added a single engine rating to that and also passed a 135 Checkride.
Nowadays I get to fly a nice Navajo on occasion. Given my history I like that it has two engines. My biggest worries in that airplane are using the Garmin 650, keeping the EGT and CHTs in line, and getting the engines started when they are hot. Though aviation has taken a back seat this year since we moved, I will take a 135 Check in that plane and start flying it a little more next year.
I would be very happy if I didn't have any more EPs. I think I have checked that box enough times........