Warped sense of humor

Discussion in 'Main Message Board' started by Ringostar, Jun 5, 2019.

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  1. dsandfort

    dsandfort Silver $$ Contributor

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    Penguin was driving down the road (penguins really like to drive).
    Smoke starts pouring out so he pulls in to a service garage.
    Mechanic says "leave it a while and go get some ice cream" (penguins really like ice cream).
    Penguins have itty bitty arms so he comes back with ice cream all over his face.
    Mechanic says "looks like you blew a seal".
    Penguin says "no, it's just ice cream".
     
    Ccrider, Clancy, mikeinct and 6 others like this.
  2. Danoh

    Danoh Gold $$ Contributor

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    ^^Oh jeez!^^
     
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  3. TAJ45

    TAJ45 Gold $$ Contributor

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    Oooooh......sad.
     
  4. carlsbad

    carlsbad Lions don't lose sleep over the opinions of sheep. Gold $$ Contributor

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    I don't know but there's a guy who is wondering who is kissing her now.
     
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  5. Immike

    Immike Gold $$ Contributor

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  6. The Viper

    The Viper Gold $$ Contributor

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    On the back of a local septic companies truck there are two hands of cards. Underneath the cards reads " A straight flush is better than a full house".
     
  7. Macropod

    Macropod

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    Local business has "You dump it, we pump it!" signage on their honey sucker truck.
     
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  8. chop house

    chop house Silver $$ Contributor

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    didn't take long for this thread to go down the toilet...
     
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  9. USMCDOC

    USMCDOC

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    When someone asks me if i am all right.. i say, "No, i am half left"!
     
  10. CT10ring

    CT10ring Gold $$ Contributor

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    Septic tank truck- "yesterday's meals on wheels." yup true slogan
     
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  11. snert

    snert Silver $$ Contributor

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    Raining harder than two cows pissing on a flat rock
     
  12. snert

    snert Silver $$ Contributor

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    I heard peach pits...but all funny
     
  13. mike a

    mike a 6BR Rocks Gold $$ Contributor

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    Gross, I wish I hadn't read that.
     
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  14. Rick300

    Rick300 Gold $$ Contributor

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    Probably my all time favorite joke!

    <iframe width="483" height="362" src="" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>
     
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  15. 'Freak

    'Freak

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    Do unto others worse than they would've done you ...
     
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  16. MikeT49

    MikeT49 Gold $$ Contributor

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    Just had my septic tank pumped. On the back of the truck: "Satisfaction guaranteed or double your load back"
     
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  17. GotRDid

    GotRDid Silver $$ Contributor

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    I followed a “STOOL BUS” too closely once; valve was not secure and just missed getting my car “painted”.
    GotRDid.
     
    Last edited: Jun 9, 2019
  18. GotRDid

    GotRDid Silver $$ Contributor

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    FB33AB2A-8AA6-4538-A96F-6D542F314FB6.jpeg
    GotRDid.
     
    mac86951, js2013, okie and 8 others like this.
  19. mike a

    mike a 6BR Rocks Gold $$ Contributor

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    Don't watch this thread if your eating. Oh, to late.
     
  20. Larry Klutts

    Larry Klutts Gold $$ Contributor

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    Very entertaining thread.

    -1-.JPG
     
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